Snippets
by Liila6241
Summary: A series of random drabbles and one shots surrounding the lives of the Avengers. Set at various points in time. Multiple Pairings. Rated M.
1. In MY Office?

**A/N: This came to me at 1:30 in the morning. I need sleep.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Avengers!**

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In MY Office?

Nick Fury is a patient man.

Working at Shield for the past thirty odd years has caused him to see some shit that would make even the toughest of men run home screaming for their mothers.

However, nothing could prepare him for the sight of Captain America, _a national icon_ and a man he's looked up to _for years_, on his knees with his lips wrapped around the dick of one Tony Stark.

Nothing is going to get this sight out of his head.

"_Steve, you're so fucking good,"_ Stark gasps tightening his hold on Rogers hair. "Whomever taught you how to give head is my fucking hero." He thrusts upwards into the other man's mouth and groans. "Yeah, baby, take it all, you fucking slut."

Fury's eyebrow twitches. He doesn't give a shit about what these two idiots do in their spare time and, frankly, it's about_ time_ they hooked up. But, did they really have to fuck in his office? Stark's bare ass is squeaking against his favorite leather chair with every movement and the sound is giving him a headache.

The Director, who's standing in the doorway, clears his throat and watches as Rogers immediately ceases his actions, releasing Stark's penis with a loud, wet pop that's going to haunt Fury's nightmares. The Captain fumbles to his feet, wiping his mouth, and trying (read: failing) to cover the tent in his pants while Stark is fully relaxed in Fury's chair. The brunet is leaning back with his dick still hard and standing at attention, wearing a smug look on his face. At least the Captain has the decency to look embarrassed and ashamed.

Fury watches Rogers take a nervous gulp, trying to meet the Director's eye. "Sir—" he begins, voice sounding hoarse. Well, gee, Fury wonders why that could be?

The Director holds up a hand and the man falls silent. "I don't care what you do and with whom you do it. However, I don't want your business all up in my space. Now, put your dicks away and get the fuck out of my office."

Stark sits up, looking like he's going to argue, but one glare from the Captain shuts him. The brunet tucks himself back into his pants and stands, tilting his chin up and walking out of the office like the high and mighty king he thinks he is. Captain Rogers follows skittishly behind him.

Fury pinches the bridge of his nose and enters his office, shutting the door behind him. He walks over to his chair and looks down at it. He sighs. He's going to have to burn it.

Nick Fury may be a patient man, but he honestly isn't paid enough for this.


	2. Tony Stark, you have a Heart

**A/N: This was supposed to be a scene in Chapter 5 of my story "Skyfall" but I decided to omit it from the posted version. I didn't want to just delete this part (because I do like it), so I decided to make it into its own thing. I hope you enjoy! :)**

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Tony Stark, you have a Heart

Clad in his Iron Man armor, Tony flies around the city heading towards battle. The team received a call from Coulson earlier in the morning saying that Loki is stirring up some trouble again and they have to subdue him.

He continues scanning the area before seeing large debris from Loki's attacks knock into a telephone pole, causing the wooden beam to tip and break its lines. The engineer normally wouldn't be concerned about a falling telephone pole, but this one in particular is heading for a group of about six people all huddled together unaware of its collapsing. Tony immediately takes off, watching as one of the women notice the pole and scream, alerting the others of their presence. Iron Man puts himself between the group and the pole, easily catching the item between in his hands. He gently lowers the telephone pole to the ground being mindful of the other citizens.

The genius leaves the pole and hovers near the group. "Are you guys alright?" he asks. Now that Tony can observe the group, consisting of two men and four women, he notices a woman sitting on the ground, her face twisted in pain and clutching her ankle. The other members of the group surround her. The two men appear to be trying to encourage her to continue onward. The other three women are gazing at Tony with wonder.

One of the women nods. Her face is pale, expression filled with relief, wonder, and worry. Her brown hair is pulled back into a messy ponytail, clothing cut and covered in dirt. She's not wearing any shoes. "We're okay. Thank you. Trixie, though, hurt her ankle. We were trying to help her to move when I noticed the pole and . . ." she trails off, glancing back at the other people before turning back to Tony. "We were going to take my car, but it's missing. I'm pretty sure someone stole it."

Tony frowns behind the faceplate. While the engineer is an asshole _at times_, he would never steal some poor woman's car. That's a real dick move. He glances around and flags down two women in a pickup truck. The driver pulls over, rolling down her window and poking her head out, brunette hair styled in a pixie and eyes alight with worry. "You folks okay? Need a lift?"

"Yes, please. It would mean so much," the ponytailed woman says.

"Hop on in," the driver says.

"Let me give you a hand," Tony says. He hovers by Trixie, gently lifting the woman off the ground bridal style, and setting her in the bed of the truck. The other five people join Trixie in the back and shoot Iron Man various expressions of gratitude.

"Thank you so much," the woman Tony spoke with earlier says.

Tony shrugs even though the civilians can't see. "It's what I do. You all stay safe, you hear?"

"We will thank you."

The engineer gives the group one last look before turning away and taking off, once again heading for the battle.

"_It seems sir, that Miss Potts was correct when she said and I quote "Anthony Edward Stark, you do have a heart. And this is proof."_

"Hey! Enough from the peanut gallery," he says slightly annoyed, but that doesn't stop a fond smile from creeping over his features.


	3. DNA

**A/N: Just another random middle of the night drabble! **

**Featured song: "DNA" by Little Mix (lyrics from azlyrics)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Avengers or the song used!**

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DNA

Tony runs into the Avengers common room with his laptop in his hands and a huge grin on his face. He plops down on the couch in between Thor and Bruce, nearly shaking with excitement.

Bruce glances at the engineer. "Should we be worried?"

The billionaire shakes his head, grin still firmly in place. He takes a deep breath. "You'll never believe what I just found," he says eagerly, rushing through his words.

Natasha grabs the remote off the coffee table and pauses her show. "Alright, I'm curious. What have you found?"

"JARVIS, project my computer screen onto the television," Tony says, setting his computer on his lap. The AI wordlessly complies. The engineer's screen appears on the tv showing a paused video on YouTube with the title: "This is what I do in my free time."

"Your username is IAMIronMan471?" Steve questions, furrowing his brow.

"Hey, I don't judge you for your life choices," Tony retorts.

"Yes you do! All the time!"

"Shhh," Tony shushes harshly, earning an unhappy groan from the Captain. "Just watch this," he says before pressing play.

The video begins with a man wearing a long red wig, aviator sunglasses and a purple leotard standing in front of a blank white wall. He has a remote in his hand and he presses a button that causes music to start playing in the background. "_Does he tell you he loves you when you least expect it?" _the man sings off key.

"Oh my god," Natasha exclaims, disbelief evident in her tone. "Is that Clint?"

"Yes!" Tony responds his grin returning in full force.

"_Does he flutter your heart when he kisses your neck?"_

"Wait, is he in Avengers Tower?" Steve asks curiously, a smile creeping up on his features.

"Yes!" Tony exclaims, placing a fist over his mouth to contain his laughter.

"_No scientist or biology. It's obvious when he's holding me. It's only natural that I'm so affected." _Clint raises his left hand to run through his wig. "_And my heart won't beat again  
if I can't feel him in my veins. No need to question, I already know." _

"Wait, this is the best part," Tony says.

"_It's in his DNA—D-D-D-DNA. It's in his DNA. And he just takes my breath away—B-b-b-breath away. I feel it every day, and that's what makes a man not hard to understand. Perfect in every way. I see it in his face. Nothing more to say. It's in his D-D-D-DNA." _ Throughout the chorus, the archer tries making sultry glances and poses at the camera.

He's failing.

The team burst into uncontrollable laughter, so much that even Bruce has to wipe away a few tears. Because they were so loud, they didn't hear the ding of the elevator and a curious voice asking, "Hey, what are you guys watchi—OH MY GOD! JARVIS!"

The screen goes blank and the Avengers attempt calm down, looking at the seething Clint in front of him. Each member is wearing various expressions of amusement.

"Clint, I'm sorry," Natasha says trying to calm herself down. "But was that my wig?"

"This is what you Midgardians call entertainment? I must say it is most pleasing."

"Didn't it hurt your genitals to wear that tight outfit?" Bruce wonders aloud.

"If it makes you feel any better, I've seen soldiers in my time do much worse," Steve adds.

"No, it doesn't," Clint snaps. "You guys are such assholes, I can't believe this." He turns on his heel and storms away towards the elevator.

"Clint, wait," Tony says seriously causing the archer to turn around. "Do you still have the leotard?" he asks with barely contained laughter.

"STARK I CAN'T—" Clint exclaims before entering the elevator.

The team watch the doors close. Steve frowns. "Hey, do you guys think we were too hard on him?"

"Nah," Tony responds, brushing off Steve's concern. "He'll be fine."

Later that week, the archer replaced Tony's shampoo with Nair. The agonizing scream that resonated through the tower sounded like sweet, sweet music.


	4. Cruise

**A/N: This was originally apart of Skyfall chapter nine, but the chapter was already long enough. However, I still liked this scene and decided to upload it here! **

**Song featured: "Cruise" by Florida Georgia Line**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Avengers or the song.**

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Cruise

"Hey, Cap, can you turn up the radio?" Clint asks. The team had woken up early this morning and had decided to waste the day shopping. It didn't take long for everyone to get ready, pile into the minivan and hit the road.

"Sure," Steve responds before complying with Clint's request.

'_Baby, you a song— you make me wanna roll my windows down and cruise.'_

A huge grin crosses Clint's features as the song flows from the speakers. "This is my shit!"

Natasha rolls her eyes. "Every song is your shit."

"I know right?" Clint exclaims as the first verse starts. _"Yeah, when I first saw that bikini top on her she's poppin' right out of the South Georgia water, thought, "Oh, good lord, she had them long tanned legs!" Couldn't help myself so I walked up and said—"_

The archer gently nudges Natasha with an elbow and earns a barely suppressed smile for his efforts. Nat rolls her eyes and joins him for the chorus. _"Baby you a song—you make me wanna roll my windows down and cruise down a back road blowin' stop signs through the middle, every little farm town with you. In this brand new Chevy with a lift kit would look a hell of a lot better with you up in it. So, baby, you a song—you make me wanna roll my windows down and cruise."_

Thor smiles and sways along to the song even though the look on his face says that he has no idea what's going on. Bruce nods his head and taps his fingers against his knee. Steve hums along to the song and Tony quietly sings along. Clint must have heard the brunet singing because before he knows it, the archer is saying, "Take it away, Stark!"

Tony rolls his eyes and complies anyway. _"When that summer sun fell to its knees. I looked at Steve and he looked at me _(the blond rolls his eyes fondly)_ and I turned on those KC lights and drove all night cause it felt so right, her and I, man we felt so right."_ The brunet reaches for Steve's right hand and laces their fingers together. _"I put it in park and grabbed my guitar  
and strummed a couple chords and sang from the heart. Girl, you sure got the beat in my chest bumpin'. Hell, I can't get you out of my head!"_

The team harmonizes the chorus together, mostly off key and mumbling the lyrics they don't remember. When the song ends, Clint lets out a cheer and starts clapping. Steve brings his and Tony's joined hands to his lips and places a light kiss on each knuckle. The brunet looks at his boyfriend and gives him a small, genuine smile.


End file.
